70 funny Instagram 'Notes' to post right now (2024)

Instagram "Notes," the app's newest sharing feature, is a throwback to the good ol' days of AIM and MSN Messenger.

No clue what Instagram Notes are? Let us explain.

The feature, which launched on Dec. 13, allows users to post short, 60-character messages for either their followers or close friends. Once posted, the notes show up at the top of other people's inbox and remains there for 24 hours before disappearing forever.

While you can always use this feature to share a status, it's also an opportunity to show off your sense of humor. If finding something witty to say isn't exactly your forte, you're in luck because we've put together a list of funny Instagram Notes to help get you started.

From clever emoji messages to short quips from classic sitcoms like "The Office," "Schitt's Creek" and "Friends," we've got a treasure trove of Instagram Notes ideas sure to get the creative juices flowing.

In the meantime, the only thing you need to do is choose a funny one-liner to post on the 'Gram, then sit back and let the DMs roll in.

Instagram Notes ideas inspired by TV and movies

• "Can I get an alcohol?" — Nick, “New Girl”
• "Is butter a carb?" — Regina, “Mean Girls”
• "Nom, nom for us."— Alexis, “Schitt’s Creek”
• "Love that journey for me." — Alexis, “Schitt’s Creek”
• "My life is an inconvenience." — Alexis, “Schitt’s Creek”
• "Ew, David." — Alexis, “Schitt’s Creek”
• "It’s a feeling stick." — Jess, “New Girl”
• "Can we just take a minute to celebrate me?" — Schmidt, “New Girl”
• "I’m trying very hard not to connect with people right now." — David, “Schitt’s Creek”
• "I will not feel shame about the mall pretzels." — David, “Schitt’s Creek”
• "You just fold it in." — David, “Schitt’s Creek”
• "It’s my turn to take a selfish." — David, “Schitt’s Creek”
• "Gum would be perfection." — Chandler, “Friends”
• "Could I be wearing any more clothes?" — Chandler, “Friends”
• "I’d pee on any one of you." — Joey, “Friends”
• "Can I interest you in a sarcastic comment?" — Chandler, “Friends”
• "We were on a break!"— Ross, “Friends”
• "I understand nothing." — Michael, “The Office”
• "I am Beyoncé, always." — Michael, “The Office”
• "I am faster than 80 percent of all snakes."— Dwight, “The Office”
• "I’m not superstitious, but I am a little stitious." — Michael, “The Office”
• "I feel God in this Chili’s tonight." — Pam, “The Office”
• "Fact: Bears eat beets. Bears. Beets. Battlestar Galactica." — Jim, “The Office”
• "I gotta get on that Internet. I’m late on everything." — Seinfeld, “Seinfeld”
• "I’m on no sleep. No Sleep!" — Seinfeld, “Seinfeld”
• "Hello, Newman." — Seinfeld, “Seinfeld”
• "Yada yada yada." — Elaine, “Seinfeld”
• "Yama hama, it’s fright night!" — Kramer, "Seinfeld"
• "I’m ready, I’m ready." — SpongeBob, "SpongeBob SquarePants"
• "F is for friends who do stuff together 🎶." — SpongeBob, “SpongeBob SquarePants”
• "Fine dining and breathing are all I know how to do." — SpongeBob, “SpongeBob SquarePants”
• "Ravioli, ravioli, give me the formuoli." — Mr. Krabs, “SpongeBob SquarePants”
• "Look at all the hip young people eating salads!" — SpongeBob, “SpongeBob SquarePants”
• "The inner machinations of my mind are an enigma." — Patrick, “SpongeBob SquarePants”
• "Why must every 11 minutes of my life be filled with misery?" — Squidward, “SpongeBob SquarePants”
• "Sweet Davy Jones! What the heck is going on?" — Mr. Krabs, “SpongeBob SquarePants”
• "The best time to wear a striped sweater is all the time 🎶." — SpongeBob, "SpongeBob SquarePants"

Instagram Notes ideas using emojis

• 🍷 🍷 🍷= 🤣🥴🤮
• Hey, I just met 🫵🏻 & this is 🤪 but here’s my #️ 📞 maybe?
• I want to believe 👽👽👽
• Livin’ in a 🚐 down by the 🏞
• 📖 'em & 😭
• Gag me with a 🥄
• Called in 🤒 but really 🏝 🤫
• Never too early for 🥂
• Iykyk 👀
• Buh-bye 👋🏽
• I’ve got a 🤒 and the only 📝 is more🐄 🔔
• Tfw you agreed to plans in the a.m. and now 😱
• I'll have a side of 🍸 with that
• Skrrt 🚘

More Instagram Notes ideas

• Can ur mom pick us up?
• Sorry I'm late. I didn't want to come.
• DM me with Jeremy Allen White’s #.
• Big yikes.
• Sorry not sorry.
• Got snacks? Asking for a friend.
• Game over. Please play again.
• Staying up WAY past bedtime. Look out 9pm, here I come.
• Checked into Rosebud Motel.
• I’ve got questions.
• Who's up?
• Life’s short. Don’t waste it reading my Insta note.
• Currently in battery-save mode.
• Hold on, let me overthink this.
• Currently unsupervised.
• Nothing isn't impossible I do it every day.
• Trapped in the body of someone who wants to sleep.
• My fave party favor is not going.
• Understood the assignment.